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The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he is a baby.
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The past is an old armchair in the attic, the present an ominous ticking sound, and the future is any body’s guess.- James Thurber
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The President has kept all the promises he intended to keep.
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The problem with the designated driver program, it’s not a desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house. Jeff Foxworthy quotes
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The radio has no future!- Lord Kelvin
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The reason there are two senators for each state is so that one can be the designated driver.
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The right honourable gentleman is reminiscent of a poker. The only difference is that a poker gives off the occasional signs of warmth.
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The secret of longevity is to keep breathing.
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The shoe that fits one person pinches another; there is no recipe for living that suits all cases.- Carl Gustav Jung
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The study of economy usually shows us that the best time for purchase was last year.- Woody Allen
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The sum of intelligence on the planet is a constant; the population is growing.- Anonymous
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The superfluous, a very necessary thing.
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The taxpayers are sending congressmen on expensive trips abroad. It might be worth it except they keep coming back!
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The tiger can”t change his spots. No, wait, he did! Good for him!
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The trouble with young writers is that they are all in their sixties.
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The true man wants two things: danger and play. For that reason he wants woman, as the most dangerous plaything.
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The two basic items necessary to sustain life are sunshine and coconut milk.
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The universe is a big place, perhaps the biggest.
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The way taxes are, you might as well marry for love.
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Then he’s got the little beard going on. He’s like Lord Of The Rings, the entire cast. Michael’s about to jump species.
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