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My wife is a light eater. As soon as it’s light, she starts to eat.
Author: Henny Youngman
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A diet is a plan, generally hopeless, for reducing your weight, which tests your will power but does little for your waistline.
Author: Herbert B. Prochnow
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It would be far easier to lose weight permanently if replacement parts weren’t so handy in the refrigerator.
Author: Hugh Allen
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Fat is not a moral problem. It’s an oral problem.
Author: Jane Thomas Noland
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I have gained and lost the same ten pounds so many times over and over again my cellulite must have d’j’ vu.
Author: Jane Wagner
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When I buy cookies I eat just four and throw the rest away. But first I spray them with Raid so I won’t dig them out of the garbage later. Be careful, though, because that Raid really doesn’t taste that bad.
Author: Janette Barber
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If you really want to be depressed, weigh yourself in grams.
Author: Jason Love
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If you have formed the habit of checking on every new diet that comes along, you will find that, mercifully, they all blur together, leaving you with only one definite piece of information: french-fried potatoes are out.
Author: Jean Kerr
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I’m allergic to food. Every time I eat it breaks out into fat.
Author: Jennifer Greene Duncan
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More die in the United States of too much food than of too little.
Author: John Kenneth Galbraith, The Affluent Society
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Govern well thy appetite, lest Sin Surprise thee, and her black attendant, Death.
Author: John Milton
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Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow ye diet.
Author: Lewis C. Henry
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I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond.
Author: Mae West
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I bought a talking refrigerator that said ‘Oink’ every time I opened the door. It made me hungry for pork chops.
Author: Marie Mott
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There is a charm about the forbidden that makes it unspeakably desirable.
Author: Mark Twain
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The commonest form of malnutrition in the western world is obesity.
Author: Mervyn Deitel
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My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people.
Author: Orson Welles
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The only way to lose weight is to check it as airline baggage.
Author: Peggy Ryan
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Reality check: you can never, ever, use weight loss to solve problems that are not related to your weight. At your goal weight or not, you still have to live with yourself and deal with your problems. You will still have the same husband, the same job, the same kids, and the same life. Losing weight is not a cure for life.
Author: Phillip C. McGraw, The Ultimate Weight Solution: The 7 Keys to Weight Loss Freedom, 2003
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To lengthen your life, shorten your meals.
Author: Proverb
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